1 lb. dried rice noodles
lukewarm water
Place noodles in large bowl and cover with lukewarm water.
Set aside for 10-15 minutes until somewhat soft and pliable.
In a microwave safe dish, mix together:
3/4 cup fish sauce
1 cup sugar
1 cup white vinegar
1/4 - 1/3 cup of ketchup/catsup
1 - 2 tablespoons paprika
1 1/2 tablespoons roasted red chile paste (the roasted part is key
here although you can substitute 1 - 2 capfuls of chili powder in a pinch)
1 large tablespoons Sambal Oelek chile condiment
2 tofu "cutlets" compressed, dried, fried tofu - chunked into bit size
triangles - because triangles always seem to taste better.
Microwave until everything but the tofu is liquefied and set aside.
In a large skillet or wok 1/2 + cup vegetable oil (I never said this was low-fat)
Heat and add 6 cloves of minced or pressed garlic
When brown, not burnt, add 2 bunches of green onions, sliced 1 pound meat of choice (and this works fine without) Add drained noodles and stir fry until is evenly mixed. Add liquid mixture and mix. This will need to cook for about 10-15 minutes. If it starts getting too dried out, you can add a little water without diluting the flavor.
While this cooks ribbon 2 large carrots with a peeler
Rinse and drain 1 cup of bean sprouts
Thinly slice 1 head of Napa cabbage or 1/2 head red cabbage
Finely chop 1 cup peanuts (I use salted)
Cut 1 lime into quarters
To the noodles on the stove, crack 2-3 eggs, slightly scramble and slide mixture under the sides if the noodles. When these are cooked, toss this mixture in with the veggies and garnish with chopped peanuts and lime juice.